Service as a Path To Happiness

A Reflection on the Second and First Halves of Life (In That Order)

I. What I’m Doing and Learning in the “Second Half of Life” . . .

It seems I have landed in a new place, what Harvard Professor Arthur C. Brooks in his book “Strength to Strength” and Franciscan priest Richard Rohr in his book “Falling Upward” would call the “second half” of my life.

I don’t just mean retirement. I retired from full-time law practice almost two years ago, although I’m still advising clients and their attorneys in a few matters within my areas of expertise.

No, the new big change for me is the end of many years of active volunteer roles in nonprofit organizations. For most of my career, when my working days weren’t completely consumed with paying work and time with my family, I engaged with several nonprofits (bar associations, academic institutions, and others) in a variety of roles, serving on and sometimes leading governing boards and program-focused committees, task forces, and the like.

I justified the volunteer time commitments to my law firms by suggesting that these engagements would promote the firms’ visibility and attract new business, and also happened to be worthy of the firms’ support in their own right. Thankfully, my managing partners shared my interest in supporting the work of the organizations in which I and other firm lawyers were involved, so it was an easy sell.

While there often are good business reasons for taking on such roles, those are not the only, or even the best, reasons for doing so. Like countless others who have joined and become active in bar associations and other public-oriented groups, I was largely motivated by my affinity for the organizations’ missions, my enjoyment of the work, and my appreciation for the friendships I was able to develop with fellow volunteers and professional staff.

It didn’t dawn on me until this summer that, after all these years, I was finally stepping off the nonprofit ladder, or, to be more accurate, stepping down from my remaining leadership roles. Three years ago, I allowed myself to term out of one of my most significant commitments, and this year saw the natural ending of two others. From my limited vantage point, I felt like I had taken a giant, though not entirely unwelcome, leap into the void.

The only substantive volunteer role I’ve retained is a fairly new one, in a non-leadership capacity, with a large policy-setting body of the American Bar Association. Even there, I’m a mere minnow swimming in a well-established and heavily-stocked pond. But the work is important, the meetings interesting, and the people inspiring. So, I haven’t entirely separated from the organized-bar mothership yet.

When I’m not attending one of the two yearly meetings of that group, I spend much of my time working from home and looking for modest ways to contribute to things that matter to me and that I hope are helpful to others, like teaching law students, hosting my podcast (“Higher Callings”), and writing this newsletter. I also take time to learn and nourish my soul by reading good books and articles, listening to my favorite podcasts, joining the occasional webinar, exercising, participating in parish worship, and nurturing my relationships with friends and family. And sure, I also pass time in seemingly unproductive ways, but that’s just fulfilling a need to conserve my energy and my sanity by temporarily stepping out of life’s rushing stream.

As each year passes, I know I can’t continue even my few remaining active pursuits forever. To borrow from poet Andrew Marvell, “at my back I always hear time’s winged chariot hurrying near.” (The purpose of Marvell’s narrator was, shall we say, less than honorable, but that great line came to mind and I’m determined to use it.) For me and others like me, the happiness to be found in this second half of life lies in devoting time to family, staying connected to friends, and finding ways to make a positive difference for the people and causes you care about. And you finally come to understand that it isn’t the size of the impact that matters, only that you’re doing your part, small though it might be, to make the world a better place.

II. . . . and What I Learned in the First Half

As I and other members of my generation gradually and, one hopes, gracefully fade into the sunset, I am increasingly aware that the innumerable challenges the world faces will belong to those who come after us, most of whom have their own heavy burdens to bear. For those who have not yet reached their second chapters, here is my unsolicited advice: Do what you have to do to earn a living and raise and enjoy your families, but if you can manage more, don’t stop there.

It’s not just that the world needs you (it does). It’s also that there is much reward to be found in serving others, and almost an infinite number of ways to do so. Attending to people and causes beyond yourself will increase your sense of meaning and fulfillment. As most happiness gurus will tell you, directing your focus away from you and towards helping others is one of the surest paths to a happy life. And doing good in the company of other good-doers can lead to friendships that will enrich your life for years to come.

You can find ways to serve that fit the person you are. Service can mean volunteering at a nursing home or food kitchen, becoming a big brother or big sister, teaching financial literacy or civics through schools and other groups that offer such programs, or joining and becoming active in a charitable organization that interests you. If you are a lawyer or other professional, it can mean taking on pro bono matters for those who need but cannot afford your profession’s services. If you are a person of faith, it can mean participating in the life and charitable outreach of your place of worship. If you haven’t yet chosen a career, a life of service can mean a career focused on addressing the needs of others, whether as a doctor, nurse, dietitian, teacher, social worker, interpreter, lawyer, public safety officer, soldier, government employee, cleric, environmental or peace activist, or any number of other vocations.

I was most comfortable volunteering through board and committee work, and nonprofit organizations certainly depend on the generous commitments of time and resources from people who make them. But among the people I have most admired are those who are out in the trenches, providing hands-on help to the hungry, the stranger, the sick, the prisoner — the people in need whom my faith tells me should be loved as my neighbor. The all-too-few occasions when I have served in that way were among the most satisfying experiences of my career.

And let’s not forget the arts. Bringing beauty and meaning to those around us through artistic endeavors is also a valuable form of service and part of what makes us human. Paint, write, sing, dance — find your talents and share them with others.

Maintain an interior life as well, whether through prayer, meditation, journaling, or other means. And don’t neglect opportunities to have some plain old fun. Serving others requires taking time to renew yourself.

Whatever half of life you’re in, volunteering for worthy causes can be the most rewarding work you do. When you get to the half that I now occupy, you will likely look back on that service as a tremendous source of joy and satisfaction — even in those moments when, like me, you consider the dedication of the many people whose sacrifices vastly exceeded your own, and you only wish that you’d done more.